"So how are you feeling anyway?" Probably a question we are asked a lot more than we really want to answer. And if we are being real do we actually answer this question honestly? I'm willing to bet most of the time we say we are fine even if we aren't.
Why do we do this? Is it because we really don't want to talk about how we are actually feeling? Maybe we feel like we are going to be annoying or a burden if we really tell the truth? Sometimes we just might not feel like talking about it. Or maybe we think the person asking really doesn't want to know the truth of how we are actually feeling. Are we embarrassed, scared, ashamed?
Of course there are times we had a bad morning, or didn't drink our coffee or just ran out of our favorite creamer. Maybe our car wouldn't start, or our kids wouldn't get out of bed, our alarm didn't go off or we pressed snooze one too many times... I don't think it's a stretch to say these things happen to all of us and well we just don't want to talk about it.
But what I'm really getting at with this questions is this, what if you really aren't doing "fine" or "ok"? What if you really want to say how you actually feel? That you are stressed, anxious, depressed, scared, worried, alone, hurt, or that you just feel lost. What if you are at your lowest of lows and you don't know how to come back, you don't know how to fight any longer. These are real things we struggle with it doesn't matter how old we are, our gender, race. hair color, education.. MENTAL HEALTH - MENTAL ILLNESS doesn't care.
I am so tired and flat out pissed at the way our society views any sort of mental health struggle. I see it all over the place; in the form of bullying, discrimination, judgment, ignorance, the looks, the silent accusations. WHY? why do we do these things?? Why do we do them to each other to ourselves to our loved ones? I know that I don't have the answer to these questions but I do know it's time to end the stigma surrounding mental illness, it has to stop. Let's make it ok for people to talk about how they are feeling, make it ok for people to ask for help and to not feel ashamed because they need help.
When someone goes to the doctor because their back hurts and they don't know how to make it better, do we ridicule them? Of course not, so why do we hold the disease of mental illness to a different level? Why is it so wrong to ask for help?
I don't know all of the answers or even know what to say when I see someone struggling but, I do know I can be there for them, I can listen, I can point them in the right direction, I can make them feel valued and loved and that they deserve to be happy, free from anxiety and depression. WE ALL DESERVE THIS!
So here is my truth, I struggle with and suffer from anxiety and depression. I am trigged when people around me have too much to drink, I am triggered when I hear about or see domestic violence. I'm brought back to places I never want to return to, because some of those memories are like reliving the trauma over and over again. My life's choices are largely impacted by my mental health; I am blessed to have found my peace in the hard times, the triggering times, and the times I can't stop thinking about my past experiences.
Please, I am begging you just be kind, offer to listen, when you see someone struggling tell them you care, tell them you love them. And maybe you don't understand what they are feeling or going through but you can still be there, you can still support them.
The only way we can end the stigma and make it ok to ask for help or support is by taking action it only takes one second, one person, one smile, one prayer to change someones entire future.
If you are hurting or need healing or just need to know that you are not alone I leave you with this:
